At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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