Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I just pynch a tree in the face
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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