she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
