Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Randomize