fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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