Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize
