I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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