Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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