They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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