I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Randomize