Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
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also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
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I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
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