dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
