im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
