so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
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