I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
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