I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Randomize