What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
