Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
There r osticjed everywhere
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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