is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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