Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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