I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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