Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize