all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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