And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
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