i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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