wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
