eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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