i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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