You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize