Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
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