bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Randomize
