Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
