I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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