everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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