is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
