maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize