Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize
