i just wanna soil my oats bro
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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