Heybabeimwearingurpanties
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
