Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
We need to get me chipped asap
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
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