i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
no. you can't hotbox the world.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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