I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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