yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
I looked at my own cervix.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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