I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Randomize
