Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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