Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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