ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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