What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
