You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Randomize
