Three words: puerto rican gang bang
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Drunk is a universal language darling
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